One Simple Challenge

Dojo Diaries #25

When I started karate, I was very aware of my age, especially since I began by joining in my daughters’ class… with me being the only adult.

It didn’t help when one 11-year-old kid came up to me after class one day and asked how old I was. Determined not to tell my age, I frantically searched for a way to answer without giving a number.

“I’m older than Sensei,” I said.

This kid turned to study her for a minute. With deep awe, this person quietly said, “Wow.”

Needless to say, this did not help my confidence because I asked myself one question all the time.

Can I do this?

When I started karate, I had low confidence in my abilities. While I wanted to learn, I wasn’t sure if I could.

I recently read a book called Feel the Fear… and Do it Anyway by Susan Jefferes. In it, she proposes that the “bottom of every fear is simply the fear that you can’t handle whatever life may bring you.”

She continues to say that to diminish your fear (or low confidence) is to “develop more trust in your ability to handle whatever comes your way!”

And so, since karate is my prime example here, as I experienced it week after week, my confidence built as I learned I could handle whatever came my way, whether it was tricky blocks, spinning kicks, or falls. Maybe I couldn’t do them perfect, but I could do them.

“Remember that the minute you take your first step into the life of your dreams,
the first to greet you there will be fear. Nod. Keep walking.”
Brianna Wiest

Fear is our companion that can keep us safe, but it can quickly take control to the point of ruining our lives.

Susan Jeffers goes on to make the point that fear will never go away and that the only way to conquer fear is to go out and do what we are scared of. Then when we make something happen, not only does the fear of the situation go away, but you build self-confidence.

Don’t wait until you’re confident to show up. Show up until you’re confident.

In karate, we practice rolls and falls. In keeping with the age comment of my fellow student, I was greatly wondering what my old back and muscles were going to do when I attempted a roll.

My first roll was not graceful. Not in the tiniest bit.

You know what those 11-13 year olds did? They clapped and high-fived me.

Total encouragement.

And I love them to death for it. They still do it - no matter if it’s awful or wonderful.

And my confidence builds a little.

What I didn’t know at the time was that I was building confidence. Each try of a hook kick or a downward block is moving towards success, even if it is completely wrong. I am still so thankful that my sensei encouraged us every tiny step of the way.

“Confidence comes from discipline and training.” Robert Kiyosak

After I got my yellow belt, I challenged myself without telling anyone. I had noticed my sensei laughed if we groaned when she gave us a hard challenge. I took it on myself to beat her at this game.

My challenge was that I would not groan or whine at anything she had us do in class. My reaction was to be “Yes, ma’am!” or “Let’s do this!”

During the year, it was fascinating to feel the change from constantly asking myself if I could do it to responding with a “Yes, I can” response.

Instead of dwelling in fear or dread, I chose to face a challenge with a positive attitude, and it gave me some excellent results.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but one of power, love, and sound judgment.”
I Timothy 1:7

Fear comes from the devil. So we nod at fear because it’s always good to acknowledge our opponent. But we don’t stop. Not a chance. We keep walking.

Fear wants to keep us down. But God wants us on our feet, walking, working to break the chains of darkness, and setting the captives free.

We may not be able to make fear go away, but we don’t have to listen to it.

“We can’t escape fear. We can only transform it into a companion that accompanies
us in all our exciting adventures. It is not an anchor.” Susan Jeffers

Ignore the fear.

Build the confidence.

You’re next,
Vicki Virginia